My Story

     So, what's my story? Which one? As with everyone, I have so many different ones, some will interest you, some not, some will be sad, but more will be funny. And some will just make you scratch your head and wonder what on Earth is going on (most of my stories do that to me).
     The first story I'm going to share is how I became saved. Some people have a nice quite shift, others, like me, have a slap upside the head BAM! kinda salvation. 
      But first, some background on me. Both my mother and father's families were/are Catholic. So, I was baptized when just a few months old, even though my parents didn't attend a church. My grandma, however, did. Every Sunday. So, dress up baby in really pretty gown, sprinkle water on head, and head home for party. My Catholic life started. I don't honestly think my mom & dad ever went to church, but every weekend I spent with my grandma, I went with her. Got my workout in each week; sit, stand,kneel, sit, walk to front, stand, kneel, if you've ever been to a Catholic service, you know what I mean. (I mean no offence to any Catholic's out there. but, it is how it works) I went to a Catholic school for 2nd grade so I could receive my 1st Communion (back then if you went to a Catholic school, you were taught to be Catholic - no choice, if you didn't want your kids to be Catholic, you didn't send them to a Catholic school.).
     Fast forward to about age 13. My mother discovers the occult. Reading taro cards, numerology, horoscopes, being one with nature ect. At least we never used a oujii board. She believed that God gave you the ability to read the cards if you meditated and asked for it. And, of course she taught it all to me. And, I could do it. I could read the cards, runes, anything and got it right more often than not. As long as I can remember, I have always had dreams that would come true. I thought that was all just a part of my psychic abilities. (I have learned better since, that prophecy is a gift of the Spirit, and it's all a from God, not my ability, but His gift)
     Not too much later, I began to see the benefits of looking at the darker side of things. That those who follow a dark path have more powers, have more of an ability to see the future, control their environment. I was not aware of what was going on, until one night, when I was 14, I was lying in bed, trying to make my mind empty so I could have a "vision", when suddenly I saw what I can only describe as a living black shadow coming  towards me! I could see around the black thing, but not through it! I couldn't breath, I was in a cold sweat, I started to see stars, I knew it was going to enter me and do what? Still don't want to think about what could have happened to me that night. What stopped it? I cried out as loud as I could, which probably wasn't very loud at all, "God, please save me! Send it away!" and it left. 
     I would like to tell you that I turned away from it all right then, but I can't. I did stop trying to empty my mind at night, but instead would say Hail Mary or The Lord's Pray each night. Without my knowledge, He was already protecting me, despite my continued failing.
      At age 16, the boy i was dating was Catholic (well, he and his family went to church each Sunday, but every Saturday beer & pot was the norm, his mom gave it to him -- I am proud to say I never actually smoked a joint, and since I didn't really like beer, I didn't get drunk either), so, we went to church each week. At 19, 6 months pregnant and the mother of a 20 month old, I became a single mother one day. I began to go to church again, for about a year. Long enough to baptize Ky & Jy.(fancy clothes, sprinkle water, off to party) After about a year of marriage to my husband, I again went back to church. Clearly I was looking for God, but was having a hard time finding him. I left church that last time right after all the scandles about priests molesting boys came about. At the exact time, I was also getting, what can only be called collection notices, from the church. "you pledges $$$ and haven't paid us. Please pay $$ by xx/xx/xx" Really, I'm not kidding, and they were coming weekly! (it honestly was a choice between food or church donation!) The issue I had with the church and the priests wasn't that the crime was committed. Priests are people and they are good and bad, just like everyone else in this world. Yes, they SHOULD all be good, but you can't really know what is in someone else's heart. My problem was the cover up. They didn't punish the priests, they just moved them somewhere else, where the problem continued. Since I was sexually abused as a child (no, not by a priest), I know what those people have to live with, and it could have been 100s less kids if they dealt with it properly. 
     So, bye, bye church. This time for good. That was about 2002. It would take six years before I really became saved.
     However, I am out of time. So, I shall end this story here, on a cliff-hanger of sorts. Don't worry, I'll finish it. Until next time,
Blessings,
mamaAthena